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Post by Raistlin on Nov 10, 2008 2:06:55 GMT -5
Over a month later I've got the third chapter up. Feel free to read it and critique it. Even spelling and grammar is good to point out. I'm already thinking about chapter 4 so get ready for it. I hope it won't take a month, but it might. Just enjoy this and let me know how you feel about it. I'm glad to have gotten this finished and posted finally.
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Post by SForce on Nov 10, 2008 10:26:50 GMT -5
I enjoyed it alot! I like the direction of putting DC aspects into the story. The literalness (<--- not a word) of Salamander Tavern and Goblin Mounds was very unexpected but very good. I like the story and where it's headed. Now it's time for DG to start and the members to come in  |
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Post by Raistlin on Nov 10, 2008 11:55:06 GMT -5
Yeah I kinda felt I had to since once you left S&D what were you gonna do? In DC aspect all you would do is quest out in the world since you don't have an actual home anymore. Most people when they have multiple chars they'll send their alts out for questing and the main will just be managing them from home. If you're not in a clan everyone is out questing and wasting time. Then there was a need for a trial to get to making the clan. The portal just came to me and I went with it. Things should be interesting through the next chapter too.
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Post by SForce on Nov 11, 2008 11:04:30 GMT -5
I'm excited for the next chapter and what's to come with starting the clan and MS's reign or whatever you have planned |
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Post by Morge on Nov 12, 2008 13:45:00 GMT -5
Yeah it was great. I've been reading it at his place as he wrote it. It all came together nicely. I was saying how cool it'll be when he brings in more clans and see how he puts the story in motion.
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Post by SForce on Nov 12, 2008 18:51:02 GMT -5
I want to see how Raist puts together every leader's reign's as leaders of the clans as well as Gryffindor and KotD and White Fire as our Alliances
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Post by AntonyJC on Nov 12, 2008 21:50:45 GMT -5
"While bowing to the queen SF slowly walk back down from the throne. The queen was all gushing and giggling as he walked away. As he passed a few stone pillars he heard some heavy laughter. SF drew his blade and turned towards the sound. A creature was rolling on the ground in the shadows. SForce crept up to it and grabbed it while putting the tip of his blade to its throat. Looking in its eyes SF realized what it was. "JC? What's going on?" "Oh please, Mr. Charmer," he said while spitting out laughter, "don't hurt me. You wouldn't want the light of your queen's beauty to shine down on such a brutal scene. BWAHAHA!" "Oh, give it a rest. I got what we needed. Now get a move on." SF tossed JC to the ground and sheathed his blade. As he walked for the door JC called out to him. "Right behind you, ya pointy eared poopsie. HA!"" ahaha i liked this part and the cliffhanger of me and the knght very good |
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Post by SForce on Nov 13, 2008 10:57:13 GMT -5
aren't I just so romantic  |
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Post by AntonyJC on Nov 14, 2008 0:52:46 GMT -5
omfg i was dying after i read that and  i wanna know what happens to me  ... and sf you didnt come to save me bastard  |
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Post by Raistlin on Nov 14, 2008 12:05:39 GMT -5
Well he couldn't. He already went through the portal. Just wait and see what is in store for you, JC. I've got that part already in my head.
Oh and by the way. I'm posting this story in the DC forums in the War Stories section. I hope to make others interested enough to come by the forum and see for themselves what's DG all about.
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Post by AntonyJC on Nov 14, 2008 19:02:55 GMT -5
thats amazing man good stuff |
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Post by SForce on Nov 15, 2008 22:25:43 GMT -5
Because you didn't join DG initailly, you were still in S&D when we made DG, you came a few days/weeks later, that's why you were left behind. Originally it was me and MS, you came later. So you couldn't be with us to start the clan |
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Post by AntonyJC on Nov 17, 2008 21:48:24 GMT -5
thats right true that man. good stuff
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Post by Raistlin on Nov 18, 2008 13:49:43 GMT -5
When SF gave me that bit of info I had to change the story a tad, but I was already heading in that direction so I just needed to shift your path a tad, lol. It worked out quite well though.
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Post by AntonyJC on Nov 18, 2008 19:09:19 GMT -5
yeah its iight when's an estamited time for the next one? like a month or a couple weeks?
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